One Word: Mid-Life Perspective (Round 2)

I've been going through the points from Keith Drury's recent Tuesday Column entitled "Happy 50th Birthday," a look at the decade of life we call the 50's. My last post focused on his first six points. Starting with #7 I'll continue with my thoughts as I ponder this word "perspective” - my word for the year - in light of his article.

7. "Last job." Keith throws out a valid assumption that in your 50's you're probably going to make a choice of sticking with the job you have or moving on to what will probably be your last job before retirement age hits. 

Except for a few part-time jobs in the mix of raising kids, I committed to being a stay-at-home mom. When I was raising our four children, along with my involvement in the work of the church, I knew myself well enough to know that I couldn't have managed a full-time job. My best play has been to come along side Dennis to support and encourage, and to be available to serve where my gifts and strengths fit best no matter where we are in life and ministry. But, who knows... maybe someday down the road my "last job" will be my "first job." As for Dennis... as I said before, going beyond local church ministry wasn't on our radar, but the early 50's definitely brought about change for us. Keith says it's rare for a person to take on new work in their 60's, though, he says it sometimes does happen.

8. Health scare. Health issues can begin to surface in the 50's. There are certainly no guarantees on life. We both try to live in a healthy way and have been blessed with good health thus far. In fact, Europe has been good to us health-wise. We walk a lot, eat less sweet stuff, and eat smaller portions. We ask one of our missionary friends here in Hungary if they gain weight when they go back to the states. Without much thought she responded: "As soon as we step off the plane." It's true!

9. Family changes. Keith sums it up like this. You enter the 50's with kids finally leaving home. You usually exit the 50's as a grandparent. 

Well, this certainly has been true of us - going on 5 grands at the half way mark (at least for me :). Moving overseas has changed family life, though even before we left Michigan, we were navigating what it looked like to be a long-distance family with our grown children living from east coast to west coast. Intentionality is key! Technology has definitely given us an advantage. We can Skype, phone, email, and facebook within minutes, if not seconds. But, no matter if the family is near or far, the family dynamics change in this stage of life. As Keith pointed out, everyone use to come home for Christmas, now we visit the kids for the holidays.

10. Faith. I'm going to quote Keith's remarks for this one rather than try to summarize.

You may settle some faith issue you took for granted in your 40’s 30’s and before. You may face some doubts you never entertained before. You might enter what James Fowler calls “conjunctive faith.” You might become more close-minded and more open-minded simultaneously.

I think in this new era of post-modernism and post-Christianity, Keith's statements especially ring true. I will only speak for myself here. I have asked more questions about my faith in this decade than ever before. The Christian beliefs that I have always held to, and perhaps at times took for granted, have been tested in this decade far beyond what I ever saw coming.  

I have another article by Keith in my files where he shares the pencil-pen-blood issues of our faith. (See Keith’s article on pencil-pen-blood here for further understanding into these thoughts.) Without going into much detail here, I can say that I have become more open-minded in those things that are pencil and pen, but even more solid in the blood issues of my faith. As a child I can remember quoting the Apostle’s Creed every Sunday morning in the church my family attended.  It had meaning to me then as I considered the words recited along with the rest of the congregation. And, those words have even more spiritual significance to me now that I am in my 50’s. Not many years ago I remember Dennis preaching on Thomas, the doubter. “Lean toward, not away from Jesus,” he encouraged those with faith questions.  It made sense because it’s the Spirit of God who “guides us into all truth.” So much more could be said here, but I leave it with that.  

11. Generativity. Dennis and I have talked about this as we entered this decade. We have observed “older” folks who become inwardly focused. Keith calls this inward focus “stagnation.” We observe others who keep giving of themselves. This is where Keith’s word “generativity” comes in, which is all about investing in the coming generations. This is where Dennis and I want to live and continue to live… life-long learners who are life-long investors.

Well, I guess Keith skipped the #9 and I didn't notice until I was listing this out on my blog. So eleven points to think about instead of twelve.

Since I'm a seasonal person, I thought maybe the word "perspective" would last me for three to four months. Then, my plan was to move on to another word. But I'm telling you, if I have many more things come my way that speak into my word "perspective," it's going to have to last the year.

It's going to take me a year to get the focus from "perspective" in full swing. You may be hearing about this word all year long!